So here you are, pregnant, excited, nervous and about to make a very important decision. What will you call your shiny new bundle of joy?
So many questions to consider to make:
- Will this name suit a baby?
- What will their name look like on their CV?
- What will people shorten it to?
- Are you about to doom your baby into a school career of being bullied?
- Do we tell people what the name is in advance?
The final question is one we made the mistake of doing.
My husband and I had been together for 8 years when we fell pregnant, 9 years by the time she arrived, so we’d already had the baby name conversation several times. We had our names carefully picked out for a good 5 years in advance, never wanting to change them.
John for a boy, April for a girl.
We found out we were pregnant in August, I worked it out that we had fallen pregnant in July, let’s do some quick maths….two, three, four, five, six…seven…..eight….oh fuck. We were due in April. Fast forward to our 20 week scan and yes, as fate would have it we were expecting a girl.
Most of our family knew the names we had picked out in advance, so they knew that April’s name wasn’t just a last minute “oh she’ll be born in April so let’s just call her that” idea. However, when it came to nosy work colleagues and random old ladies who flocked to the pram like pigeons to an abandoned pile of chips it was a very different story. Here are just a few of the wonderful comments I got from people when they found out her name…
“Oh are you actually calling her April? I thought we were just calling her baby April in the office because that’s when she’ll be born” – work colleague.
“April? Lovely! Was she born in April?” – every sodding old woman I meet.
“Would she be called May if she was born in May?” – my comedian brother everyone.
“Oooh will the next one be called June?” – another old lady responsible for this one.
There were plenty more similar comments, mainly people thinking they’re the next Sherlock Holmes for figuring out that she was born in April. I’ve given up telling people that we had picked the name out years ago, and on occasion I have been known to lie and tell people she was born in May just to wipe the smug “I’m so clever, I guessed she was born in April” look off their faces.
For our next children we already have names picked out too, our boy’s name will stay the same and we have two options for a girl. One of which my mother in law has told me “If you call her that I won’t come a visit her because she has such a stupid name”, which of course warms me to the name even more. However, next time round we won’t be sharing the name in advance, because usually people will only tell you they think your name choice is shit whilst you’re pregnant, not when the baby is here. Apparently that’s much more acceptable.